all work copyright 2007 to infinity, adam dachis, all rights reserved, etc.
writing everyone needs to do something non-technical, so i do it by writing on a computer
essays, short fiction, and screenplays. all sorts of ways to find out where i go off to.
essays, short fiction, and screenplays. all sorts of ways to find out where i go off to.
Souvenirs
Download the first 45 pages
Geryon's pissed. His best friend, and unrequited love, is about to ask another girl to marry her. His first movie was panned and he's resorted to editing pornography for a living. His girlfriend cheated on him with a fifteen year old nerd that works in an old lady's clothing store. This would all be unfortunate if Geryon wasn't a complete asshole. Finding himself constipated from his recent troubles, Geryon sets off on a quest to poop while realizing what's really important in the process.
INT. GERYON'S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY
GERYON, 26, boyish, on the telephone. His hair falls in his
eyes and he brushes it out.
GERYON
Yes, Jesus Billy, I'm coming to
dinner.
(pause)
Yes, on time! Early, even.
EXT. TORI AND BILLY'S HOME - BACKYARD
BILLY, 29, sitting on a lawn chair by the pool. She's
feminine and beautiful. Long, rich brown curls fall from
her face and over the cordless telephone she holds gently.
BILLY
I really need, or want, you here
tonight.
Beside her, on another lawn chair, is TORI, 31, rough
looking. Her dark black hair is pulled back in a long,
tight French braid.
TORI
I really need or want him here too.
Tell him that. Make sure he heard
that. It's important.
BILLY
We both need or want you to come
tonight, okay?
Billy laughs.
BILLY (cont'd)
No, you're not that sexy, Geryon.
I think I'll stick with women,
thanks.
INT. CLOTHING STORE
ALLISON, 22, stands behind a white plastic counter in an
upscale clothing store. She sweats profusely.
ALLISON
Smulligan?
Toward the back of the store is HERBERT SMULLGIAN, 15,
dressed in black slacks, a checkered shirt, and a paisley
tie. A contact wedges itself out of his left eye and he
drops a pile of shirts on the floor.
ALLISON (O.C.) (cont'd)
Smulligan!
Rubbing his eye, Smulligan approaches the counter. His
voice is drastically low.
SMULLIGAN
Sorry Allison. My contact slipped
out.
ALLISON
Yeah, okay, that sucks. Did you
call Patrick about the air
conditioner? I'm sweating like a
pig. This needs to get fixed.
SMULLIGAN
No, I didn't call him yet, sorry.
(words run together)
I don't really notice the heat
because I have low blood
circulation because I'm skinny
because I have a fast metabolism
because--
ALLISON
Okay, well get on it. And I need
to get out of here early tonight.
I have a "very important" dinner.
Smulligan nods, taking in every word.
ALLISON (cont'd)
Yeah, so I need you to lock up.
SMULLIGAN
I can't until next week.
ALLISON
Who's going to care?
SMULLIGAN
The state, or, like, child
protective laws, you know? What
if my parents find out? What will
happen to you?
ALLISON
I wouldn't worry about it.
Besides, you're probably the most
responsible fifteen year old I've
met.
SMULLIGAN
Really?
Allison lays it on thick.
ALLISON
Don't people tell you that?
SMULLIGAN
Not really.
ALLISON
I watch you clean up every day.
You're very good at it.
SMULLIGAN
You're watching me?
ALLISON
Oh yeah, you're a pro. I bet
you'll lock this place up like
there's no tomorrow.
Smulligan giggles, blushing. Allison holds out the keys in
front of his face and shakes them.
ALLISON (CONT'D)
(sweetly)
So, do me this little favor?
